Moving through healing

"I thought I was over this?"

"Why is this coming up again?"

These are thoughts I've experienced through my own healing journey and would become discouraged when I seemed to be returning to old wounds I believed I had healed. This led to feelings of frustration, hopelessness, and shame because at the time my idea of healing was starting at point A and ending at point B. It was an assignment or a task that I needed to cross off of my list. Being unable to "get over it" or cross it off felt like failure and I continued in this pattern until I realized what I was doing was not actually healing but an attempt to escape the pain. Eventually I came to the realization that the human experience is layered which means healing from experiences is layered too and this transformed the way in which I moved through my journey. Here’s what I’ve learned

• What I've learned is that healing is not linear (which was freeing) and that compassion towards self is necessary while doing this work.

• I learned that healing is movement, movement through the pain while experiencing, noticing, & feeling.

• I learned that sometimes healing is moving forward, sometimes backwards, in many directions, and sometimes in quiet stillness.

• I learned that there is no right way to heal and that sometimes healing is unfinished and that's ok.

• I learned that healing is beautiful, it's messy, it hurts, and powerful, it's necessary, and it's worth it. I'm worth it.

  
  Do you ever find yourself struggling with something you thought you were over? What is something you've learned so far on your journey?